The Pregnant Heart gets, what the Pregnant Heart wants

I’ve been starving all day – just feel like eating constantly. Not artificial eating though, I’m talking full meal eating. Needless to say, we don’t leave a lot of full meals laying around this house. Adam’s a big advocate of saving leftovers, so there were some in the fridge. I worked from home today to get a bunch of things done for some big meetings the next two days. One of my fridge foraging excursions led me into a tupperware of Hashbrown/eggs/bacon left over from maybe a week ago and another tupperware of corned beef and rice, from last night. Well, throwing them together didn’t sound like a terrible idea, so that’s exactly what happened. What was I going to do to add a little freshness to the dish? Why, throw another egg in of course. It turned out amazing! I haven’t really had any weird 3AM food cravings or anything crazy like that. Throughout I’ve gone through phases of Coconut cupcake, Egg McMuffin’s, Cereal (I’m talking good cereal, like the kind coated in sugar, like Captain Crunch and Lucky Charms), and Caramello’s. Right now, I am currently specific crave-less.

I have a really sick love of eggs. I’ll eat them with everything. Egg on a salad, egg on a burger, egg on pasta? Yes please, I’ll take them all. I could eat eggs every single day of my life, they are so versatile.

I’ve been stressing about two things lately, let’s talk about each of these a little more in depth.

  1. Work
  2. Babies – and all the things that go with them
  3. My craft stuff
  4. My health

Work – I just feel like there is tons to do lately. I’ve been able to stay under 100 emails, which would have been unheard of 6 months ago even, so that’s good. I’ve been building a global team around me, which has eased the load. Tuesday and Wednesday we have big meetings and I feel ill prepared. I’ve been working on this one big project, called an Administrative Guide, that I’m building in OneNote. It’s pretty amazing, and I’m stoked on everything I’ve got into it, but I just feel like it’s going to be torn apart when I get it in front of the client. That’s disheartening. Also, I’m leaving in 3.5 months, which means that everything has to be a nice package tied up with a bow, and ready for me to move on. A sign of a good leader is one that plans succession well, so that when they leave, the company still thrives. I intend to do everything possible to make sure this happens. But, it’s all still stressful.

Babies – Building a registry, thinking of all the things I need, blah blah blah. It’s all things I don’t want to think about. We started registering on Amazon.com. It’s going ok, but i’m sure there are going to be other things that crop up, that I just don’t want to deal with. It seems like such a hassle. We might buy a stroller tonight! We’ve been eyeying the UPPAbaby Vista, and we found a total score on Craigslist, so we’re going to look at it tonight. Seems pretty slick. When we start buying stuff, that also means we needed places to put stuff (see section 3; re: Craft Stuff). I also have several friends having babies and in particular, wanted to make one something, so I have to get that together too. Not to mention that I want my baby to have something personally made by me as well.

Craft Stuff – have I mentioned that we’re putting our baby in what I’ve called my Craft Room to date? That means shit tons of cleaning and purging. I have a LOT of craft stuff, because I’m the creative crafty type. So – I have to organize, purge, sell, donate everything that I think is now low priority, having a child. I’ll probably see if my MIL wants some stuff, but the vast majority, I’d like to sell so that I recoup some of the money I spent on all this amazing stuff. That’s stressful. I’ve been trying to do it in small chunks, but find that I’m too tired to really get anything going while I’m home. I expend all my energy at work every day. Then I get home and just want to relaxing.

My Health – it’s not terrible, so don’t get me wrong. However, I gained a substantial amount of weight in the last month, which I found out at the Dr on Friday. I’m disappointed in myself. I don’t feel like I’ve been using pregnancy like an excuse, but I have been eating whatever I can. A lot of normally healthy, great, and delicious things just don’t sound like something I want to ingest, quite honestly. It’s been rough in that aspect. Not to mention that I get tired really easy, so working out really hasn’t happened. Walking, like everyone tells you to do, hasn’t even been happening. Adam keeps offering to walk with me, but like I mentioned before, I am always just too tired. When in the hell is this second burst of energy that everyone and their mom keeps speaking of going to happen? Probably never for me!

Baby is getting more active every day. Last night he was trying to keep me from sleeping, but I won that battle! My uterus is the size of a soccer ball right now, at 26 weeks along. That is mind boggling to me. I like staring at my naked stomach, it’s fascinating in my opinion. I’m not really doing anything, but I’m some how growing a whole human inside of me. We signed up for our birthing classes. 6 excruciating evenings for 2 hours each. Are you serious? Seems like overkill. Oh, and I was reading up on healing after the birth, which I shouldn’t have done, because my vagina is going to be a disaster zone. Anyway I can just plan to not have a vaginal delivery? That sounds swell. Could we also cut me open before stretch marks start? That’s another thing, I inspect my stomach every day while lubing it up to look for new stretch marks. So far, coast is clear. This uterus is going to stretch all the way to my sternum, my Dr says, and I’ll feel like I can’t breath. Stretch marks come around the no breathing time, usually. So, another awesome stage I get to look forward to. Great… I’ve always known I would be an amazing mother, but I have ALWAYS dreaded the act of actually being pregnant. I’m finding the actually being pregnant portion not so bad, but the whole squeeze something the size of my cat out of my vagina things, is terrifying. Why does everyone keep saying that this will all be worth it? Did you know my belly button will never be the same? Supposedly I’ll grow a half shoe size at some point too. These all sounds like negatives in my opinion.

On a positive side note – I have never felt more in love, and connected with Adam, knowing that we’ve made a baby that I’m growing inside me, and the excitement we both have to meet him.

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Confessions

1. I put monosodium glutamate on my grilled cheese sandwiches. That’s right, I do add MSG to things. It’s amazing!

2. I feed my cats every morning, while I’m on the toilet. Otherwise, Wicket claws my legs until I feed him.

3. I shower quickly, because I hate being wet. There is nothing cool about being covered in water unless your a) at a water park  b) dehydrated or c) really sweaty

4. I, apparently, pick my nose in my sleep. I have yet to witness said event, so I am highly disinclined to believe my husbands stories about this.

5. I’m somewhat anal when it comes to certain things. I hate loose hairs on my pillow, or on Adam when he sheds. I clean my ears way too often. I also clean my nails a lot. I have to pick a scab. Eyeboogers must be removed even if it makes your eyes hurt.

6. I love dresses and girly things.

What are your six fun confessions?

Morning Conversation

Hubs: Do you know where my headphones are?
Me: No, but if I find them, I can run them down to you.
Hubs: OK, but call first, cause I may not need them anymore.
{Still searching around in the office}

Me: I feel like I found them in your disc golf bag and said, “hey, what are these doing in here?”
Hubs: That doesn’t sound right.
{on his way to his bag}
but…{shuffling}…you never know….
{pulling headphones out of disc golf bag}
You’re a genius!

Truer words were never spoken.

Confessions of an addict

I’m an addict. I tend to jump into things both feet forward, balls to the wall. I’m obsessed with checking my email, because I get super stoked when somebody buys something out of my Etsy shop. I need to stop buying coffee and just drink the normal stuff. I have a ton of make-up, despite the fact that I only wear make-up, probably 50% of the time. I also have endless hair clips and head bands, even though I usually wear a couple bobbi pins and black elastic pony tail holder. Lotion, how could you not love lotion? I love the smells, and love everyone I have ever bought, or convinced someone to buy for me. Nailpolish – OPI I love you. Despite the fact that you run over $8 per little bottle.

Anytime I want something, I should sit on it for a week, then see how bad I still want it. Except shoes…those I should buy the instant I fall in love with them.

Approaching Milestones

I think milestones are a funny thing. They are supposed to be significant achievements or moments in time that capture something big or progress to something big. As I approach a couple milestones, I’ll share them with you when they hit. I was just thinking about some of them nearing and it’s exciting! (No, I’m not pregnant, nor attempting, so stop trying to fan that flame!)

I was thinking aloud about my friends with Adam the other day. They’ve all done some amazing things, gone some amazing places and met some interesting people. Sometimes I take a look at their lives and say, “do I wish I had that?”. Would I want to travel to random places with nothing but a bag? Would I want to go on crazy hiking expeditions? Would I want to date, or learn to make bikes, or sign up for new things and meet entirely new people? It’s one of those sins you know, Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors goods. I don’t want for any of these things. Even though my amazing friends have done some amazing things that I have not done, I have done my own amazing things. I’ve lived in a foreign country for multiple years, I’m the only one with mixed parents, I’ve bought a place to live, I’ve bought multiple cars, I’m married and I have ambition. I love the life I’ve created. Part of the reasons we are good at being friends is because we are different. I think regrets are silly. To me, things happen for reasons. I acknowlege and move on. It doesn’t mean that I wouldnt’ do some things differently if I had to all over again. It just means that I recognize my blessings and am happy with them.

On with the fun more interesting stuff!

Check out this ratty stool I picked up for $5 thrifting…

Throw in $7 worth of plasticky table clothy stuff and $6 of spray paint…VOILA! An uber beautiful $18 hit!!

Remember the library file? Well, the drawers were sticky/tacky, from lack of ever being cared for! Got the thing for free, spent about $10 on supplies to clean him up and SHIZAMM!! He’s neat. I still need to do some work and make some dividers for some drawers…but we’ll see if we actually get there. It’s pretty sweet. Some drawers have solid bottoms and some have one line down the middle where the “track” runs. I’ve already started a list of labels for the drawers. I was thinking I’d use the typewriter, but I might actually stamp them. We’ll see. I need to find the most perfect paper…

More Tomorrow

This is me doing my hair. It might look like a hot mess, but it turns out just plain hot.

I’m also trying to pick a wall color for my studio. What do you think . I’m thinking the color smack dab in the middle so far….

Found the perfect table at my first stop this morning SUPER Stoked!

Now, I’m organizing said studio so that I can fit all this shizzz into it…..

Love Me

No Saturday Steals this week 😦 I was busy shopping wedding gown shopping with my future SIL. So, I thought I would just say HAPPY VD to everyone, and curse working early hours, because they are why I’m up at 5:30 AM on a freaking Sunday!

Friday was a pretty magical evening. We cooked a delicious dinner that included Asparagus Omelets, toast, fresh strawberries, a candle and milk in wine glasses. Did I mention that we don’t have a kitchen table right now? Yeah, so this was on our card table with one chair and our two step stool, haha. It felt like we were just moved out together and couldn’t afford furniture. Oh the memories of living with one papasan for about 3 or four months as our only living room chair/couch.

After dinner we played some magical rounds of backgammon (I lost all of them), and an intense round of Triple Yahtzee!, which I also lost. But it was still fun to sit and sip wine while we played some board games and listened to some good music. I lvoe playing board games with him.

By the way, if you’re going to play Yahtzee, Triple Yahtzee is the only way to go. Don’t be a math puss and chicken out. I bought our version at a thrift store for $1.99 and it came with everything, and an unopened box of pads inside! Just my personal thoughts.